Christmas Gifts for the Whole Family

     Alright get ready, I have had a redbull and I'm ready to find the perfect Christmas gifts for your loved ones this year. You should start thinking about this because Kohl's and JCpenny are already cramming the ideas down my fucking throat.

For Mom:

Deck the Halls with DUI's

For Dad:

 All I want for Christmas is a deadbeat dad

Brother:

Roasting Chestnuts on my boyfriends face

Sister:

Christmas is coming and so is your anorexia

For Uncle:

Oh Holy turkey, I'm gonna rip into your flesh

For Aunt:

Santa Claus is coming to town, so is Animal Control

For Grandpa:

Do you see what I see? Dementia!

Grandpa needs directions back home from the mailbox

 For Grandma:

The most wonderful time of the day

And when she waits for grandpa's 5 hour trip to the mailbox

For MY Husband:

Jingle Balls

For HIS ball scratching pleasure

     These are just some of my ideas I'm still working out my creativity block, hopefully it comes back to me. I'm having a lot of insparation today, from people who I hate, so stay tuned. I think tomorrow I'll delve into either mail order brides or why people do not need a college degree anymore.

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Thanks always <3 --R