Thursday, September 8, 2011

Unsupervised

     I know you people who know me personally, know that Chris is going to be deployed again to Kuwait for a year. NOOOO not with the military but with a private contracting company doing some kind of super fucking classified shit ( I know, it's a big deal). Anyway I have lost a little creativity lately thinking about this constantly. I have wanted to cry my fucking eyes out on a daily basis thinking about my best friend being gone. He knows he is doing the right thing for himself and for our family but either way it is going to be hard. There are some people who bust his balls on a regular basis about him "leaving his family," and "abandoning Robyn and Cami," to those people I say back off and that's all the time I have for you. I also have not written like I normally would because I have been trying to hold my tongue and not say anything stupid to fuel the fire. Well fuck it. With my lack-of-creativity-week behind me I started to write a blog about why we do the things that we do but my heart wasn't really in it. So I started to think of ways that I could incorporate what is going on in my life with this blog and hopefully to lift my spirits. I have started thinking of things that I will do when Chris is gone, almost like a bucket list to keep me busy and not think about him being gone all the time. And strangely enough I found myself excited for the things that I can do while he's gone. So thank you for letting my vent a little and here is what I think I want to do while Chris is away:

  • Dress Like a Human: In the last 2 years I have really been confined to me yoga pants, soffee shorts and marine corps t's. I feel like a fucking bum. When I go to the grocery store I see people wearing nice clothes, heels and make up. To me this is pointless who are you going to see at the grocery store that will care but I guess I should care at least a little more. Also the only people who are in the store that are wearing close to what I am wearing are people who I would like to say have a "weight problem," and 30 kids running around. No fucking thanks. The prospect that that could be me is enough to get my wheels turning about getting my shit together. I am also cheap as fuck so I guess I'll be hitting up H&M all the time.

  • Work Out More: Not that I consider myself a big human by any means, however I do feel like I am not my tightest self. After I had the baby I immediately lost 30 pounds and I felt great apparently I looked like Lexi Anorexi, and still I thought it was great. But as time went on my appetite started to come back and so did about 15 pounds. I would definitely like to tighten. Also I have come to the reluctant conclusion that I am "curvy". I am built more like Kim Kardashian then Pam Anderson. Lets be real I am 5'2", and 115 lbs, I will never be long and lean but I feel like I cannot get out of looking like Snooki. I think I do that to myself because it's the easiest style for me to fit into. But if I am going to be meatball shaped, I am going to be a firm meatball. I am not a runner naturally I really have to push myself to do it so that's out. So I'm committing to yoga (hopefully HOT yoga if I can find a place in Ct that does it) and hiking. Connecticut has the most beautiful outdoors of anywhere. If that doesn't work I think my best chance is to get these items to help me:

  • Extreme Coupon: Allison and I are couponers by nature, but we are about to take it to a whole different level! I am going to pack my families home full of free-ish dry goods. Thousands of tooth pastes all over the fucking place! I am saving my coupons now! How crazy is it that you can get all that shit for like 9 dollars? I wish you could buy like everything in bulk like that chicken and meats and stuff because yeah I have 30 sticks of deodorant but nothing to eat... Maybe that will help with my weight loss.

I will be swimming in bulk foods


  • Lasik Eye Surgery and Wisdom Teeth Removal: As many people know I am blind as a fucking bat. I am tired of changing out my contact lenses all the time, there is no reason for it anymore with all of the breakthroughs in eye care. I need my wisdom teeth out in the worst way too, they are starting to hurt and I am getting a little sick of it!

  • Purchase As Seen on TV Items: I have been obsessed with the following items for years and I will finally consummate our long awaited meeting. I feel a sort of deep seeded connection to these unattainable items. I have wanted them for so long it almost seems as if I need to be pinched because they are just outside my grasp. It amazes me that with in two months I will finally have the sweet satisfaction of putting them to the test.  
  




You can cut drywall with these knives
And throw a pineapple up in the air and slice at at.
You're all getting them for Xmas

This will definitely not help with my weight loss


This product is my Eleanor.
 But I WILL have a Ronco Rotisserie.
 You will be mine and I will,
SET IT AND FORGET IT


I will shave you backwards and forwards
Watch out zucchini!




This is what happens when I am let off my leash! DILLIGAF
Thank you for letting me vent! I promise from now on I will be lighter in my attitude. It may take a week or so but I'll get back
Twitter: @bobzc
Facebook: Robyn Sludock
Email: bobzchamp@gmail.com
Love you all ---R

1 comment:

  1. I took me a sec but I did decipher DILLIGAF, and no you don't. FYI, there is a Bikram yoga place right down Rte6 from our house, across from Stop & Shop. Mmmm...bacon.

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