Ain't No Nugget Small Enough

     This is my way of forgetting what is going on in my life now. Chris is in Kuwait for a year and even though I'm moving home to be with my friends and my family, I can't help but feel like I still want my best friend with me when I go to bed at night. He does love it over there witch is a good thing so I can't really complain!   

 

     Over the next week or so I will be blogging about things that amuse me, I can't do it all at once since I have been packing like a mother fucker and I will be unpacking when I get home.

     Midgets: I love these stubby little fuckers. They are like real people torsoes with T-rex arms and Rosanne Barr legs. My favorite combo. These little nuggets are like a gift from the Easter Jesus! They are so feisty yet delicate. I was watching a show earlier called "Hulk Hogan's Mini Wrestling,"or something, all I know is that Christmas came early. Those little people know how to tangle. I wish I knew how to throw down like that. (Tru TV Fridays at 10). I wish I had one as a pet, I really do because they eat what I eat, they shit in a toilet and they can dress themselves, unlike my 1.8 yr old daughter. They are like the perfect companion. I mean I can always look down on them and I will always be the one driving, which is a big deal for me! I rather have a nugget that has some kind of talent that I can exploit at like a party or TV audition though. Like OK " Stand there and snort that spaghetti up your nose and fart it out." That would definitely take like 30 minutes more for a full grown human learn how to do. More bang for your buck in those little fuckers. I would guess that their life span is shorter than an average human, but they are just so much more fun. I have this overwhelming urge to go to the park with one, and push them on a swing, play Frisbee and gallop gleefully through a field hand in hand. The TLC channel has dominated this species. They have little people big world and the little couple. These shows would not be on TV if a regular family had 1 midget son, and the couple were regular adults trying for a baby. There is some sick kind of need for us bigs to see how these people live. There is a magnetic draw to these limber limbed humans. My husband Chris and my father-in-law Randy just crack the fuck up when I talk about a "nugget" that I have seen. I personally think that they are in awe of my commitment to these little snuggle muffins. Chris and I were recently in Cleveland and he took this picture while he was smoking outside the bar we were in, and quickly sent it to me....

This was the best present I could have gotten. And this is why I love him so much. I wasn't outside to see this and it was so romantic how he thought of me! I would like to know where they get their clothes, shoes and cars, I mean someone needs to let me in on this secret. Not because I want to go get some for myself being only 5'1", but I want to go to the lair and befriend one. Who's to say that my soul-midget isn't waiting for me somewhere. Who are they? What would they be like? Where will I find them? Will they let me do their hair? Can I put a saddle on Daisy and have them ride her? There are sooooo many questions I have. I hope one day me and my tater will unite.... Until then I'll keep dreaming...

Thanks again for reading I know I am a fucked up human but it works for me....

Follow me in twitter @bobzc and on facebook Robyn Sludock

Love always see you in a couple days! -----R

Unsupervised

     I know you people who know me personally, know that Chris is going to be deployed again to Kuwait for a year. NOOOO not with the military but with a private contracting company doing some kind of super fucking classified shit ( I know, it's a big deal). Anyway I have lost a little creativity lately thinking about this constantly. I have wanted to cry my fucking eyes out on a daily basis thinking about my best friend being gone. He knows he is doing the right thing for himself and for our family but either way it is going to be hard. There are some people who bust his balls on a regular basis about him "leaving his family," and "abandoning Robyn and Cami," to those people I say back off and that's all the time I have for you. I also have not written like I normally would because I have been trying to hold my tongue and not say anything stupid to fuel the fire. Well fuck it. With my lack-of-creativity-week behind me I started to write a blog about why we do the things that we do but my heart wasn't really in it. So I started to think of ways that I could incorporate what is going on in my life with this blog and hopefully to lift my spirits. I have started thinking of things that I will do when Chris is gone, almost like a bucket list to keep me busy and not think about him being gone all the time. And strangely enough I found myself excited for the things that I can do while he's gone. So thank you for letting my vent a little and here is what I think I want to do while Chris is away:

• Dress Like a Human: In the last 2 years I have really been confined to me yoga pants, soffee shorts and marine corps t's. I feel like a fucking bum. When I go to the grocery store I see people wearing nice clothes, heels and make up. To me this is pointless who are you going to see at the grocery store that will care but I guess I should care at least a little more. Also the only people who are in the store that are wearing close to what I am wearing are people who I would like to say have a "weight problem," and 30 kids running around. No fucking thanks. The prospect that that could be me is enough to get my wheels turning about getting my shit together. I am also cheap as fuck so I guess I'll be hitting up H&M all the time.

• Work Out More: Not that I consider myself a big human by any means, however I do feel like I am not my tightest self. After I had the baby I immediately lost 30 pounds and I felt great apparently I looked like Lexi Anorexi, and still I thought it was great. But as time went on my appetite started to come back and so did about 15 pounds. I would definitely like to tighten. Also I have come to the reluctant conclusion that I am "curvy". I am built more like Kim Kardashian then Pam Anderson. Lets be real I am 5'2", and 115 lbs, I will never be long and lean but I feel like I cannot get out of looking like Snooki. I think I do that to myself because it's the easiest style for me to fit into. But if I am going to be meatball shaped, I am going to be a firm meatball. I am not a runner naturally I really have to push myself to do it so that's out. So I'm committing to yoga (hopefully HOT yoga if I can find a place in Ct that does it) and hiking. Connecticut has the most beautiful outdoors of anywhere. If that doesn't work I think my best chance is to get these items to help me:

• Extreme Coupon: Allison and I are couponers by nature, but we are about to take it to a whole different level! I am going to pack my families home full of free-ish dry goods. Thousands of tooth pastes all over the fucking place! I am saving my coupons now! How crazy is it that you can get all that shit for like 9 dollars? I wish you could buy like everything in bulk like that chicken and meats and stuff because yeah I have 30 sticks of deodorant but nothing to eat... Maybe that will help with my weight loss.

I will be swimming in bulk foods

• Lasik Eye Surgery and Wisdom Teeth Removal: As many people know I am blind as a fucking bat. I am tired of changing out my contact lenses all the time, there is no reason for it anymore with all of the breakthroughs in eye care. I need my wisdom teeth out in the worst way too, they are starting to hurt and I am getting a little sick of it!

• Purchase As Seen on TV Items: I have been obsessed with the following items for years and I will finally consummate our long awaited meeting. I feel a sort of deep seeded connection to these unattainable items. I have wanted them for so long it almost seems as if I need to be pinched because they are just outside my grasp. It amazes me that with in two months I will finally have the sweet satisfaction of putting them to the test.  

  









You can cut drywall with these knives

And throw a pineapple up in the air and slice at at.

You're all getting them for Xmas



This will definitely not help with my weight loss





This product is my Eleanor.

 But I WILL have a Ronco Rotisserie.

 You will be mine and I will,

SET IT AND FORGET IT





I will shave you backwards and forwards

Watch out zucchini!









This is what happens when I am let off my leash! DILLIGAF

Thank you for letting me vent! I promise from now on I will be lighter in my attitude. It may take a week or so but I'll get back

Twitter: @bobzc

Facebook: Robyn Sludock

Email: bobzchamp@gmail.com

Love you all ---R

Your Relationship is Killing ME!

     Lately I have been irritated by other peoples relationships. With some people it is the lovey dovey shit that makes me sick and with others it's like your relationship fucking sucks, just end it so that the rest of us don't have to suffer. I love Chris but I don't need to have my hands on him all the time, I'm pretty sure he would knock me out for just a minute of peace. And we fight like everyone else and sometimes we say very mean things to each other but at the end of the day we can go to bed and not want to kill each other.

     I am sick and tired of seeing people on facebook and all that other shit say "in a relationship", "out of relationship", "It's complicated" every 5 minutes. Maybe if you spent half that time investing some quality time into your shit, you wouldn't be alone. There is no need to cloud up peoples news feeds with your problems.

     People who yell at each other all the time make me sooooo mad. If you hate each other that much break up. There is no need to make someone else as miserable as you are. People who make each other miserable for the fun of it or for attention are sadists. Isn't it 1000000 times more fun to watch a movie and snug up or go for a hike and talk to each other like civilized humans? Also, when you co-habitate with other people you would think that you would keep your fighting to a minimal right? Nope, some people scream at each other and stomp around having a fit like a 2 year old. Slamming this slamming that. Like shut the fuck up! Mrs. Oldassbitch in the next condo over is trying to watch Maury and eat her English muffin in peace for Christ sake!

     I got of the airplane the other day and these two people probably in their 40's were about fucking in baggage claim. Great now I have to sit there and watch these people go at it, while the airports take their sweet fucking time getting my shit off the plane. This man could have been taking a stool sample his tongue was so deep in there.

     I know I have "control issues" as I am told but I like to think that I am getting better day by day, however there are somethings the Chris does, that couldn't bother me any less. For instance, playing video games, it is annoying sometimes but I am not going to throw a hissy fit because hes caressing the ps3 remote and not me. I recently saw someone actually cut up his girlfriends chicken for her... I was appalled. Fuck that. There is no excuse for it. Shes a big bitch (literally) she can cut up her food. It wasn't like she said "could you do me a favor and cut this," it was just expected. Same kind of story, if I ask Chris for a drink and he brings it to me and there is not enough ice in it, I'm not gonna flip out like a fucking psychopath and scream "MORE ICE!!!!" WTF is that about really, get up and get your own fucking ice.

     Every person has the potential to be jealous I think. But there are some people who take it to whole new lengths.Some women can't even let their boyfriends go to a bachelor party with out freaking the fuck out and screaming at him that he is fucking the strippers. Ok bitch, he is not fucking the strippers ok, they don't want anything to do with his scrawny ass. Just because you think that the sun shines out his ass hole doesn't mean that Miss Ima Stripperface does.

     Do not bitch to me about your relationship or your sex life. There are only several people I can listen to about this ans trust me that's enough. I do not want to hear that you can't get your girlfriend to enjoy sex more then 3 times a day. No shit you can't. Give the girl a rest! I also don't like to hear about people complaining about not having sex enough. If you feel like you are not having enough sex with your partner, either tell them or get a dildo. There is literally no point in telling me this. My voice isn't going to miraculously pop into your boyfriends head as he's snacking on some pork rinds and say, "get in the mood, go fuck your girlfriend." If  that does happen, I would suggest therapy.

     I was out to dinner with this couple once and the guy wanted to go outside and have a smoke after dinner and his wife looks at him about 1 inch from his face says, "nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo" in the most whiny voice I have ever heard. Can you not be without this man for 6 mothafuckin' minutes. Good God girl chill out. He will be back, hopefully for my sake so I am not stuck with your ass all night.

There is nothing less sexy to your man then to bash him in front of other people. And I would rather not be in the middle of your awkward moment. It is one thing to joke back and forth but don't emasculate him. It is not going to make him want to be around you.

     These are just some of the examples I have. Look forward to seeing you guys tomorrow!!!

Love always ----R

5 Stupid Things Men Love

This is probably going to be one of my most favorite posts. 10 Stupid things that men love! I think men are more obvious and forward with the things that they like. Whereas women tend to hide what they like because sometimes it may not be socially acceptable. I personally identify more with men because I don't care if people I know, know I love syfy movies, I love to share! Most of the time over share. Here are the 10 most stupid things that men love

Chicken Wings: I don't really understand why men must gather together and eat wings. They are probably the most unattractive food period and there is almost no meat on them. I know first hand when I get a serious man-hunger the last thing I am looking to put in my mouth is a little chicken wing. Why can't I just eat a fucking chicken sandwich with wing sauce on it instead of eating 30 little baby chicken arms. Also when people advertise for .50 cent wings, that is not at all appealing to me. I would hope that there is some quality in that little wing, but if I am paying .50 cents god knows what the restaurant payed for it. Ripping something off the bone with my teeth makes me want to vomit. I do not want little fucking veins and tendons swimming around in my mouth.

Playing with Testicles: I think that this is appalling. I don't walk around all day grabbing at my tits. I understand that they are in between your legs and sometimes they stick, fix that, it's fine. Do not massage them in public. I do not think that any woman is going to say "AHHH FUCK look at that guy grabbin' his shit, maybe he'll let me do it." I have a family member, no names mentioned, and he is touching himself 80% of the time. Seriously like Christmas dinner he can't stop scratching at his roasted chestnuts and on thanksgiving he will not quit stuffing his hands around his giblets. Like fuck I am trying to have a good time with my family and I don't need you playing with your gum drops, as I'm trying to eat mashed potatoes.

Fake Ass Titties: I appreciate a good set of tits like the next person. But people like Coco just have to have some serious heath problems. There is nothing sexy about scoliosis. And there is just too much to handle, I mean that's not the part that you fuck...in most cases. So why the fuck do they have to be sooooo big. What men also don't realize is that no matter how big the set is, they do not look good unless they are tanned. No one wants to see a set of flesh colored balloons stapled on your chest.

Weapons: I don't really have much to say about this, I am not a fan of weapons. Lets start with guns, people say guns don't kill people, people kill people. I believe that there could not be a more false statement. If people actually had to physically slit a throat, smother or strangle a person to death, I think that there would be much less death. I think it is just easier to hide behind a gun. With that being said I understand the sportsman ship of target shooting and obviously military training. What I don't understand are knives, really what do you men need to cut? They're not going to protect you from a bear, that bear is gonna tear your asshole out and feed it to you, if you come at it like that. I find it odd too that men talk about their weapons like they talk about their penis. For instance, "I tore that target UP last night." Talking about a woman's face or Bin Ladin's face? You tell me. Or "Ahhh I've had that for years, always a good shot." There are plenty more I'm sure, so for now guys, put down the god dammed weapon and get some wings.

Anal Sex: To me this is obscene. Why do men think that an ass hole is a pleasure hole? News flash my shit comes out of there! There is nothing beautiful about looking at an asshole let alone putting something in it. Whether it is butt plugs or a penis. Men say that its better for them because the a hole is so much tighter, well it is not gonna be better for you when your ass has to walk around behind me with a shovel.

Sorry guys this was going to be a list of 10 stupid things but I think I hit the nail on the head with these 5!
Subscribe to this blog and follow me on twitter (@bobzc) and facebook: Robyn Sludock 
Also I'm always looking for new ideas so leave me a comment here or on the above noted social prostitution sites!
<3 Always---R

10 Stupid Things

Weddings: When a woman says that she has dreamed of this day for her whole life, I like to call bullshit. I know that the dress, the idea and all that maybe dreamed up. But, I doubt that Mr. Dreamy looks like or acts like your future ball and chain. I love my husband I really do, but I never ever wanted to be married EVER! I just happened to find someone who was exactly like me with a penis! And apparently steel sperm. I never dreamed of a fantasy wedding, or flowers and cake. I think that the idea of marriage and a wedding is what most people want, not what I see (a gaudy pony show). I do feel however that many of my friends have had beautiful weddings, but they did not turn into crazy bridezillas. Also, when someone says, "I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you", that scares me. To the core. To someone like me that sounds like I'm not going to be able to fucking brush my teeth with out you. It's so very final, like the last breath you know is 5 minutes away and counting....

Use the force! To prevent divorce!

Designer Purses: I love a Lucky Brand bag like everyone else, but why do women love them so much. I think that a plastic walmart bag will carry my Xanex, makeup and tampons just fine. There is no reason why brands like Coach, Prada and Louis Vittoun (spelling?) are such enterprises. Spending hundreds of dollars on a purse that screams a self proclaimed social status is fucking stupid. You're friends know you're broke, and you can't pay your car insurance because you felt the need to buy a 6 inch lime green purse for 400$. Please

Was this used in Mandy Moore's Candy video?

Sex Toy Parties: These parties make me completely uncomfortable. I think that the tools one uses to get off should be private. Some people are more adventurous then others and to be honest I have some friends that I would rather not imagine using some of those god awful things, let alone some of their spouses. I also feel that some of these toys are dangerous. Can you imagine falling out of a sex swing backwards?! You could snap you fucking neck or break your back.

This is obscene... If I wanted to fuck a "pig" I would be looking for Gary from Teen mom 

Flowers: This is a personal choice of mine, I do not like to receive flowers as a gift. I feel that it means you don't know me enough to know that I would rather have almost anything else, like a target gift card, a box of wine or a puppy I don't need. But flowers I can find anywhere, like on the side of the road, a field or my neighbors garden. Also, buying flowers for someone because you're thinking of them I can understand, but to buy someone flowers to say sorry, no no no. Why do flowers make everything better, how about, put that fucking money back in my checking account, stop fucking my sister or I'll cut your dick off or call me a cunt in front of your friends one more time I'll make sure you don't see another cunt for 10-15 because I stole your dope outta your drawer. I mean thinks like that make me feel better not, here are some sunshiney flowers that smell nice so you forget about my face smelling like my trainers taint.

Sorry baby, didn't mean to butt fuck yo mamma

Expensive Makeup: There is no reason to buy expensive beauty products. I don't know why people do not realize this. What people also don't realize that no matter how much MAC you pile on your face you will not look like Carmen Electra. Well except this classic beauty....

"I look like Lady Gaga!!!"

Tag Sales: Nothing says a bad idea like bringing someone elses crap to your house. This is how people get bed bugs and all kinds of other crap. Buying other peoples plates and glasses really fucking grosses me out too. Also the negotiating process, really why are you asking to get a better deal on something that was used?

This says "I have a shit ton of crap that would look better in you're living room."

Reality TV: I'm not going to say anything about this because I had a whole post about this topic. But I will say I know that people watch this shit to feel better about themselves hands down.

I really hope these two still have a chance at welfare and food stamps

Robert Pattinson: I know many people love him, but he is pale, pasty and greasy. Why is it that women swoon over this? I don't think that there is anything sexy about a man piercing my skin with his teeth. On top of the fact that his eyebrows are horrible!!!

Taking Drunk Pictures: We are all guilty of this, especially me. I always think that I look better drunk than I do sober. I will say it is not a good idea, but I'm sure I'll have a new facebook album next week in which you;ll see me bent over, cross eyed and with purple teeth.

This is basically me after 9pm Monday - Monday

Mixed Drinks: Over priced mixed drinks are just stupid. Why can't people just drink beer? I rather just drink beer, or straight vodka, cheap too. I don't care as long as it gets me there cheap and fast. Also the fact that they have to put a fucking salad into the top of it, like why would you do that, I'm trying to get shithoused fast and you putting food into my system is going to hinder that. I don't care what kind of fruit tree is coming out of my alcohol unless it's going to refill this glass faster than the bartender can.

Tomorrow 10 things men love that are stupid!

Love--- R

Are You a Pedophile Because You've Abducted and Raped my Soul

     In my opinion pick up lines are one of lifes best oppertunities. People don't realize that when they say something unbelieveably foul to you, that you have the right to respond. I have heard many lines, but until now I never really had thought of what to say. With that being said I have done a little research and decided that these are the best ways to respond and/or avoid people superstalking you for the rest of the night.


What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room?
-I wouldn't know go ask the 5'9" blonde haired, blue eyed southern belle over there.

Your eyes are as blue as my toilet water at home.
-My eyes are green and if that the color of your toilet water thats fucking gross

I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated by you.
-Well I'm nt drunk enough to talk to you yet

Do you want to make millions? millions of babies!
-Do you want to be called Jim Bob Duggar?

The night is young, the moon is bright, and you are here with me tonight.
-Only for about another 30 seconds because I need a refill

Your body is a wonderland and I want to be Alice.
-Alice was a 12 year old girl....

I have never had a dream come true until the day that I met you.
-When I met you I had a dream of being a stay at home mom of 10, overweigt by 50 pounds and sweaty... wanna make that dream come true?

Like the sheets on your bed I want cover you with love.
-I want to cover you with pancake batter and deep fry you my lovecorndog!

Do you have a Bandaid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.
- Want me to clean that wound with battery acid?

Did you fart? Because you just blew me away
-Trust me after my taco bell lunch and 12 pack dinner, if I farted I would have scorched your hair off.

You must be in a wrong place - the Miss Universe contest is over there.
- I think you're in the wrong place because the only "straight" person at the Miss Universe contest in Tony Danza.

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
-Does my breath smell like I'll have a hangover in the morning?

I wish you were DSL so I could get high-speed access.
-So you're saying you're a one minute man. Get the fuck outta here!

I know its not Christmas, but Santa's lap is always ready.
- I am not attracted to 300 year old, fat, white haird men.

Baby your like a student and I am like a math book, you solve all my problems
- Oh really because you+me= possibly good time / let me finish this drink= Me passed out drooling on your pillow.

You've been a bad girl. Go to my room.
-Don't act like my father because that will guarantee I will never talk to you again

Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?
-No but I had 30 prunes today.... Hey by the way do you like anal?

Roses are red, violets are blue, how would you like it if I came home with you?
-You wanna come home with me!!! YAY I'll show you my collection of celebrity tampons!!!!
Girl, you better have a license, cuz you are driving me crazy!
- Do you have a cat!!!!!I have a taxidermy licence!

If you were the new burger at McDonalds you would be the Mcgorgeous!
- I think Rosanne Barr and Tom Arnold used that in their wedding vows.

Hello, I'm a thief, and I'm here to steal your heart.
- Do you seriously have a record because

Are you tired? Because you've been running through my mind all day.
- I am tired. Wanna go back to your place so you can make me a fuckin sandwich

Your father must have been a burglar... because I swear he stole the stars and put them in your eyes
-Why yes he was, and the only thing he put in my eyes was tears and hatred

You make me melt like hot fudge on a sundae.
-You're not black?! And are you fucking calling me VANILLA!

If this bar is a meat market, you must be the prime rib.
-And you smell like bacon

Why does it feel like the most beautiful girl in the world is in this room?
-I don't know but judging by the fact that I'm the third girl you talked to I would say she told you to fuck off

Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa just what I want for Christmas.
-Are you an adult retard? or a pedophile?

Let's make like a fabric softener and snuggle.
-I like to use bounce... so bounce the snugglefuck away from me

If looks could kill you would be a weapon of mass destruction.
-That's what my husband said to me last night after I ate Taco Bell

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven.
-Nope but after the gang rape last night my knees are pretty sore...It's ok though I made 50 bucks!!!!

I hope there's a fireman around, cause you're smokin'!
-There are about 30 volunteer firemen around here right now and Brian you're one of them you fucking idiot!


This is actually one that may have worked on me!
Do you mind if I hang out here until its safe back where I farted.

You people are welcome! I would love new blog ideas! So either comment here or sent to my facebook or twitter @bobzc! Thanks guys love ya ----R

Why Some People Will Never Get Laid

     So I would like to talk about some issues I have with normal self grooming for both men and women. I think that there is a really high standard for both sexes to look good and stay in shape. There is something about that which is a good thing, I mean it encourages healthy people and hopefully rockin' bodies. However, there are many people, including myself, who takes this whole thing too far.

     Eyebrows: Who ever invented tweezers was a sadist. Who ever invented wax strips should have been awarded the medal of honor. It is so much easier to rip out 30 hairs at a time then one at a time. Fuck that. There are some people who don't know where to start with their eyebrows, I on the other hand do not know when to stop. I usually end up looking like a Hispanic with tattooed on brows. For the most part I hate when people draw on their eyebrows, but for some reason Pam Anderson still looks phenomenal with those little wax lines on her face. Then we have the people who can not start manicuring their brows. OK I get it some people prefer the natural look. But how natural is it for a human to look like a Sasquatch. I think it's safe to say that this goes for men too. I don't think that just because you are a "man," you can't wax your hairy ass eyebrows down a bit. There is nothing emasculating about it.



This is appropriate

         

This is not.....















     Facial Hair: There is not too much to say about this. If you are a woman, get it the fuck off of there. If you are a man keep it in check, no woman finds overbearing facial hair sexy.


This





Not this
















Definitely not this



Definitely this















     Lips: I have always wanted lip injections until I realized that they really make you look like you just gave Mike Tyson a blow job, followed up by a knock out.

I would have put a "good" example up for this topic, but as long as you don't look like this you're good.

     Bikini Areas: OK this is a pretty gross to talk about with your best friend let alone on here, but oh well, something has to be said! I believe that people should shave. Period. Men, woman, everyone!! I do not think that there is anything attractive about a man or a woman "shaping" their area...just get rid of it all! Why would someone want a "landing strip" leading to their vagina... I'm pretty sure if you're sleeping with someone over the age of 12 they're going to know where to put it, no map quest needed. And for the men, please shave... or manscape or whatever you call it. Picking pubes outta your mouth is not cute. You don't want to do it, what makes you think that I want to?





Ladies this is bad



Men: This is really bad



     Nails: I have a petpeve about this, I really do. Men and women need to keep their nails clean and shortish. I don't have a problem with fake nails (because we all know I love a French tip here and there) But I think that there is a point to where they're unhygienic. This goes for men too. Many men have nicely manicured nails that are long...I will never ever understand that. Also, I almost forgot, airbrushed fake nails just like plain trashy. Do not paint your nails to look like a watermelon or hello kitty. 



This Lady had to have
10 kids one for each
nail.



This stunner must have one hell
of a cocaine problem



Where is animal control when
you need it?







Now that I have completely grossed myself out, I'm going to lay down. I'm feeling like shit today, thanks to all of my research....

<3 Always ----R